Lawrence Bernstein is a friend of mine and he very kindly has written the following tips and techniques for preparing, writing and presenting the perfect wedding speech.
"I have no doubt that your wedding is organised like clockwork; that you know what drinks and hors d’oeuvres will be served and when, what time the first dance will start, and what the groom will wear in his buttonhole. But there tends to be a rather important area that barely gets a mention in the planning. The speeches. And they are often the first thing that a guest returning from your wedding will mention in answer to the question ‘How was it?’.
A great speech can make a wedding. A bad one can waste valuable time and embarrass you and your guests.
I write speeches professionally. Many of them are for nervous grooms, fathers of the bride and best men. And so I am constantly being asked for the magical piece of advice that will help create a wedding speech that is memorable for all the right reasons.
Following these tips won’t turn you into an instant success, but they should help lay the groundwork for you:
Before the Speech
· Don’t underestimate the importance of preparation
· Decide on your preferred balance between sincerity and humour. This is crucial as it sets the foundations for everything that you will do from this point on
· Try to focus on a theme that will hold your speech together (this works particularly well for the Best Man Speech)
· Create a ‘speech plan’ before you start writing the speech itself so you can see how the entire speech will flow before trying to write it
· Be relevant
· Write in short, sharp sentences
· Leave lots of spaces for pauses
· Keep it inside ten minutes
· Print out a spare copy
· Rehearse it out loud and standing up to ensure that this doesn’t throw you on the day
· Edit out the awkward bits that just don’t work while you are practising
On the day:
· Don’t try and re-write the speech on the day itself; if it’s not right by now it never will be!
· Take a deep breath before you start to release your nerves
· Read from the same cards / paper that you’ve used in practise
· Don’t drink too much
· Speak slowly
· Look around
· Emphasise key words
· Speak into the microphone
· Try to enjoy it!
I appreciate that this isn’t rocket science and that much of the skill required fits into the writing itself. But I hope this nudges you in the right direction. I am always delighted to discuss any element of your speech and my blog is regularly updated with new articles and advice: www.greatspeechwriting.co.uk
You can also call me on +44 20 8245 8999 if you’d like me to get more directly involved in creating something really special for you.
Good luck!"
